When we were little, we would grab a pencil, marker, or crayon and draw on whatever we wanted to. We would draw our mommies, daddies, and grandparents, yet no matter what we drew, or what it was supposed to be, it always ended up being a bunch of squiggly lines. However, when we would show it to our mom, her face would make an “O” and her eyes would become really big as she would say, “Wow! This is great sweetie, this really looks like…” This would cause us to beam and interrupt, “It’s you mommy!” The response would follow something along the lines of, “I knew that, you just didn’t give me a chance to say it.” She would then take it and put it with the pile of drawings that were all drawn by you, and looked the same, with the exception of different colors, on what was once her refrigerator. Scribble scrabble occurs when we have a picture in our minds but are not yet able to truly capture it into a physicality.
I am not a replacement, nor are you. We are not merely fillers that will occupy a space that was once held by someone else. See, the problem with being a replacement is that, as a replacement, you are merely re-creating memories or feelings that occurred prior. You are not adding substance, and therefore you are not cementing yourself within that person’s life. As a replacement, you are simply glazing over and smoothing out the bumps by someone else.